Night Classes have always been a part of my schedule, not because I'm a part time student but because the degree program at my school requires them for whatever reason. When I had met Coley I had, had 3 night classes and 1 daytime class. She had mentioned how Reese had logged in from work just to talk to her. This pushed me to compete so I logged in from my classes and began to talk to Coley from class.
It was reaching towards Winter Break and my friends had begun to notice that I was sneaking off to my room often and not hanging out as much. I was a little to nervous to tell them I was sneaking off to talk to a girl on the internet so I would just tell them I was tired. They had begun to either worry or something of the sort so they had told me they wanted to hang out all day tomorrow. The main reason tomorrow was so special was because a big snow storm was about to hit. When I awake in a slightly tired haze that morning after talking to Coley all night I saw that the ground was covered in a thick white frosting. If you hadn't of guessed it from the foreshadowing we were granted a snowday. That day my friends and I all went to the college center.
The college center is a building in my university that's basically a public area for students to hang around in. We went into an empty room and played video games. I had told Coley that I had class and couldn't hang out. I didn't want her to think that I didn't wanna hang out with her so I thought that telling her I had class would mean she wouldn't think so. Well, the clever girl Coley was, she looked at my school's webpage and saw that our school was closed. That night when I returned to my room she was a bit angry with me and a tad sassy. I didn't understand why since I had thought my plan was too cunning to foil. She told me she knew and I asked her why she was getting mad it wasn't like I was her boyfriend. She went quiet for a bit the silence gave me hope that maybe she considered me more than a friend. She said I was right and buried her anger.
Once anger was put aside we spent the night talking again. We had logged onto the game in which we had met and one of Coley's friends mentioned my Facebook. I was a bit shocked at first, I hadn't given Coley my Facebook. She was flustered and shy and adorable when her friend accidentally "spilled the beans". I laughed a bit and said it was okay. I asked her how she had found it. She explained to me that when I had linked her my youtube page one of my school projects up on the page had my full name in it. She then used this to cross reference me on Facebook. I face-palmed a bit and she asked me if I was creeped out and it was okay if I wanted to stop talking to her. I said she was crazy for thinking I'd ever want to stop talking to her.
The night ended and with it came the close to the school year. It was time to return home which meant I'd have to be clever with me talking to Coley. When I was younger (by younger I mean, 12) I had what many would call an internet girlfriend. Only for a 12 year old boy the line between reality and the internet are pretty thick so it was more of a pretend thing for me. Still nontheless this meant that I would spend every day and every minute I could spend on the internet in IM talking to this girl. My family noticed and forced me to stop talking to the girl so that I wouldn't become a recluse. My family is close and European families tend to be controlling over one another. I didn't want anyone to say anything about me talking to Coley. So during the nights I would sneak into my basement and pace around talking to her before she fell asleep.
I would tell her bedtime stories. In particular I told her one about a ghost since she had requested so. The story goes as follows:
Once upon a time there was a highschool. In this highschool was a very nerdy boy. The jocks would pick on him and they were really mean to him. They'd beat him up and make him do their homework. The boy really didn't like the bullies but he had nobody to talk to since he had no friends. One day the boy was eating lunch in the hallway when he heard a noise. "OooooOooOOOHHHhhh." He gasped and dropped his sandwich. He stood up and trembled a bit "Who, who's there, Jimmy is that you!? You big bully! GOLLY GOSH." A ghost appeared. He wasn't scary though. He also had a pompadour. He was a 50's ghost! "OOOOhhhhh is that a turkey sandwich, I'm sta'vin!" The ghost and the boy became friends. One day Jimmy was going to beat up the nerdy boy. The 50's ghost came out and was all like "'Ey, that ain't coo man." Jimmy stopped and all the people in the hallway where like "YEAH STOP PICKING ON HIM YOU JERK." So Jimmy apologized and said he was sorry. In fact Jimmy and the boy became friends. And the 50's ghost was the most popular ghost in the school because everyone liked him. The End!
That story comes to mind a lot because Coley really liked it. In fact she laughed about it for a long time and referenced back to it pretty often. I also mention this story because it's around this time that I began debating with myself if I was in love with Coley. I wanted to tell her how I felt but I was scared of getting hurt. The only relationship I had ever been in ended with me being cheated on and being left alone. There were lots of times when I wanted to ask but every time I tried to something happened that made me think that she wouldn't feel the same way. One night in particular I was asked if I felt "temporary." As if in other words at some point Coley and I wouldn't be able to talk every night anymore. I explained to her how asking me something like that hurt my feelings. She apologized, she didn't mean to hurt my feelings she just explained our situations makes it that way in a sense. In essence at some point she would finish school and wouldn't be able to spend nights talking to a boy online.
At this point as well Coley had pushed me to try using OKcupid. A site for online dating in the hopes that I'd find someone local. She had also made one. I couldn't seem to connect with anyone on the site. Unknowingly at the time I would just compared all their profile to Coley. I started to think maybe I had a problem because I never resolved my last relationship.
That night I had decided to talk to my exgirlfriend in the hopes that in doing so I could either tell Coley how I felt or at least be able to connect with some other girl. The talk was terrible and awkward but in the end I didn't even get an apology but bad excuses. I was going to try an tell Coley how I felt about her. I mentioned to her that night that I had talked with my exgirlfriend. To my dismay it had instead made Coley a bit mad. She told me she had to go do some things that night. The next day I had found out she talked to Reese that night. I was jealous, angry and hurt. At that point I thought that she didn't really have feelings for me that it was just me and I was being silly. So we were just friends. We still talked every night but I had given up temporarily on the prospect that I would tell her about my feelings.
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